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What to do when the answer isn’t obvious….

Updated: Sep 5, 2021

The number one concern most parents of competitive athletes have is that they just know their athlete is struggling.


Something is holding back their development. The parents can’t put their finger on exactly what it could be.


Athletes are coming home upset from practice and are discouraged. They don’t seem to have the same enthusiasm or motivation as they usually do. Every attempt to discuss with their athlete leads to nowhere; their athletes don’t offer insight to the situation. Parents have tons of theories, but nothing they can nail down. They are left feeling helpless, grasping at straws.

What do you do when the answer isn’t obvious?

Is it the coach? Are they on a bad team? Are they playing against tougher competition? Are teammates gaining ground on them physically? These questions often lead to bad discussions, because neither parent nor athlete can identify the real issue.

I have played sports and developed athletes at the highest levels. Currently I work with competitive athletes at every stage to help them transform into elite level competitors. The above are the most common destinations our minds go to; what is being done to our athlete that is making them act this way…?


This isn’t it the right mindset.


I’m going to tell you exactly what the problem is, and I’m happy to tell you the solution. Helping athletes achieve their goals is what I’m passionate about; and I have been on many sides of this problem – as a player, coach, parent, and mentor.


To be clear; the athletes I am talking about want to be elite. They have aspirations of college or professional teams. These are athletes, and parents, that are willing to completely commit to the cause of becoming the best version of themselves.


As a struggling professional football player, once I identified exactly what it was that was holding me back, the solution fueled my success. As a coach, parent, and mentor; helping athletes create the solution has been the driving force in my career. The issue for the majority of athletes is not that they don’t want to be successful, or even that they aren’t willing to work for it.

The problem is our athletes don’t take OWNERSHIP of their careers.


Ownership. That’s the problem we are facing. That is also the solution; teaching our athletes how to take ownership of what they want in their sport. Complete ownership requires your athlete is a curious, driven individual that is capable of identifying and assessing their game. They have the confidence and resilience to work through their issues; to seek out solutions to their identified problems.


"My son enjoys the Process 2 Perform program. There is a noticeable difference how my son prepares on his own. He now goes into games with a stronger mindset after going through & understanding the process. My son now creates his own mindset that encourages him to reach his goals."

- Aspiring soccer parent


In order to own your career, you have to understand a couple basic principles:


1) The mind is the most important tool an elite athlete has; we need to foster growth.

2) Have the perspective of time and focus on becoming a master of the basics. You must have a solid foundation to build on, and that takes dedicated time.

3) Make ownership decisions in the best interest of future you.


Elite level athletes aren’t waiting for someone else to hand them the answers. Their mindset is one of actively seeking progress, not passively responding to demands. Taking complete ownership of your career means never hoping for a positive solution. It means you only focus on the things you can control, your behaviors and your actions.


Athletes that learn how to take complete ownership of their careers are able to create their own routines and develop habits that will make them the best version of themselves over the long term. They can focus more on the process over time than the day-to-day peaks and valleys. They understand this moment, this day, or this week will not define their careers.


An athlete is defined over time by their body of work. When you ask their family, their friends, teammates, opponents; the people they respect most in this world consider the entire picture; not one practice or Sunday afternoon.

Parents: if you can give your athlete the tools to become elite, then you are setting them up for success in their athletic careers and beyond. Master your mindset, master your technical skills, and make ownership decisions in the best interest of future you. Help your athlete develop a healthy perspective of time and embrace each moment as an opportunity to chase the best version of themselves.


Ownership is the key to finding long-term athletic success.


I would like to invite you to learn more at my next masterclass event. It is specifically for parents, like you, who want to help transform their athletes into elite level competitors. It is completely free and information that will definitely change your approach to development. Click here to register for this limited space event!


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"Working with Mike was the best developmental experience of my life. I looked forward to training every day. Not just because I got so much better, but because of the connection that I made.”

- D1 Athlete


"Need to listen to this guy – I used to get mad at him sometimes and take it out on the practice squad! But he was always right, Mike knows how to make great players better"

- All Pro Athlete




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